I moved to Denver and regretted it because it was freezing, expensive, and hard to make friends. I’m much happier now living in Spain


I moved to Denver and regretted it because it was freezing, expensive, and hard to make friends

Howard Kelly’s journey from the bustling streets of Atlanta to the snow-capped peaks of Denver, and finally to the sun-drenched shores of Málaga, Spain, is more than just a tale of geographical shifts.

Howard kelly pic

It’s a profound narrative about the search for a better quality of life, the challenges of adapting to new environments, and the discovery of what truly makes a place feel like home.

His story resonates with anyone who has ever chased the dream of a perfect home, only to find that paradise is not just about scenic views but also about warmth, both in climate and community.

Howard 2

In 2021, driven by a desire for greater connection with nature and spurred by a promising job opportunity, Howard uprooted his life along with his wife and two adult children, moving to Denver.

What was anticipated as a thrilling adventure quickly unraveled due to the harsh realities of life in the Rocky Mountain capital.

This story unfolds Howard’s transition through these cities, highlighting the stark contrasts between his experiences in Denver and Málaga and encapsulating the essence of what it means to truly belong.

 

The Draw of Denver

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The allure of Denver was undeniable for Howard and his family.

Leaving behind the humid climate and dense urban sprawl of Atlanta, they were captivated by the promise of Colorado’s vast natural landscapes—a paradise for an outdoorsman.

Howard, an avid hiker and mountain biker, envisioned weekends exploring the Rockies, breathing in the crisp mountain air, and returning home rejuvenated by nature’s tranquility.

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The reality of moving, however, was a complex blend of excitement and logistical challenges.

The family sold their home in Georgia, carefully selecting a spacious apartment in Lakewood, a suburb just 20 minutes from downtown Denver.

The move was a logistical ballet, coordinating the transport of their belongings and ensuring their two elderly dogs would be comfortable during the long journey.

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As they settled into their new home, the initial weeks were filled with exploratory trips into the mountains, visits to local eateries, and attempts to weave themselves into the social fabric of their new community.

The beauty of Colorado was undeniable—rugged peaks painted with alpine sunsets, and wildflowers dotting the landscape like splashes of paint on a natural canvas.

But as the novelty waned, the challenges of daily life in Denver began to surface, bringing with them a chill that went beyond the weather.

 

Challenges in Denver

Weather Challenges

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Howard’s first and most formidable adversary in Denver was the weather.

Accustomed to the predictability of Georgia’s seasons, the Michiels family found themselves unprepared for the capricious climate of the Front Range.

Mornings could be bitingly cold, with temperatures plunging below freezing, transforming into deceptively warm afternoons that encouraged short sleeves and sun hats.

The winters proved particularly brutal.

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Howardrecalled an early warning from their apartment complex about an impending cold snap, where temperatures were expected to plummet to negative five degrees Fahrenheit for several days.

“It was a stark introduction to winter in the Rockies,” Howard noted.

The family struggled with this new reality, particularly the impact on their aging dogs, who were reluctant to venture outside for their walks against the biting cold.

One vivid memory that stood out for Howard was during their first major snowstorm.

“Our dog needed to be picked up from the vet, and despite our best efforts, our car couldn’t handle the icy roads,” he shared.

The ordeal of navigating Denver’s hilly terrain in a snowstorm with an ill-equipped vehicle was a harsh lesson in the demands of living in such a volatile environment.

Social Challenges

Beyond the physical discomforts, the social climate in Denver also posed unexpected challenges. The Michiels family found it surprisingly difficult to form deep connections.

“People were friendly on the surface, but it was hard to move beyond casual acquaintances,” Howard explained.

Despite joining local groups and participating in community activities, the warmth and openness they had experienced in Atlanta were conspicuously absent.

Howard was particularly disheartened by his experiences with local churches and community groups.

Efforts to engage with these circles often ended in polite conversations that seldom evolved into the meaningful friendships they had hoped for.

“I remember leaving one church feeling more isolated than when I entered,” he remarked. Invitations to homes were rare, and the family’s own efforts to host gatherings were met with polite declines, citing busy schedules.

Cost of Living

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Financial strain further complicated their adjustment. Denver’s cost of living was a rude awakening. “The rent was astronomical compared to Atlanta, and every expense seemed to add up to a daunting total,” Howard said.

Their two-bedroom apartment, modest by their standards, commanded a rent that climbed steeply within just a year, mirroring the city’s surging housing market.

This financial pressure was a constant reminder of the economic challenge embedded in their new Rocky Mountain life.

As the discomforts accumulated, the dream of a fulfilling life in Denver began to fade, replaced by the longing for a community that felt more like home.

The decision to leave came from a place of deep reflection on what the family valued most—warmth, both in relationships and in weather, and a pace of life that allowed for leisure and enjoyment.

 

Decision to Move

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The culmination of Denver’s unpredictable weather, the superficial social interactions, and the escalating cost of living pushed Howard and his family to reevaluate their priorities.

The stark contrast between the life they envisioned and the reality they experienced became too great to ignore.

“Living in Denver felt like we were constantly battling against the environment, both socially and physically,” Howard explained.

This realization led to a pivotal family discussion that would steer their journey towards a more fulfilling destination.

Howard, now in his early fifties, felt an increasing urgency to prioritize quality of life over career-driven motives. “I started questioning the American work ethic of living to work.

I wanted a life where work is just one part of a fulfilling existence,” he said.

The family longed for a community that valued leisure and personal connections over productivity and profit.

This shared sentiment sparked the idea of moving abroad, where lifestyle philosophies aligned more closely with their own.

The choice to move to Spain was influenced by several factors.

Howard had previously vacationed in Málaga and was enchanted by its laid-back culture, friendly locals, and the warm Mediterranean climate—a stark contrast to Denver’s harsh conditions.

Additionally, the cost of living in Spain seemed more reasonable, and the promise of a better work-life balance was alluring.

Preparing for the move was an enormous undertaking.

The family sold all their furniture, their car, and pared down their possessions to ten suitcases.

The logistics of moving overseas were complex, especially considering their three pets.

The journey was not just a physical relocation but a significant emotional transition, embracing the unknown and leaving behind the familiarity of the United States.

 

Life in Málaga, Spain

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Upon arriving in Málaga, the Michiels family immediately felt a sense of relief.

The warm breeze off the Mediterranean Sea, the vibrant streets lined with orange trees, and the welcoming smiles of their new neighbors confirmed they had made the right decision.

“The atmosphere here is so different; it’s like the city is inviting you to relax and enjoy life,” Howard recalled with a smile.

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Their new home was a spacious two-story apartment with four bedrooms and two bathrooms, which they rented for $1,400—a stark contrast to their cramped and costly apartment in Denver.

The cost effectiveness extended beyond housing; day-to-day expenses were also more manageable.

“Internet is about $60 a month, and while some things like cars and technology are more expensive, overall, the cost of living here allows us to enjoy a higher quality of life,” Howard explained.

One of the most appealing aspects of life in Málaga was the work culture. During the summer, many tech companies operated on a reduced schedule, allowing employees to finish work at 3 p.m.

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“It’s fantastic because I can spend more time with my family, maybe go to the beach or just relax at home,” said Howard, who had secured a position through a Digital Nomad Visa.

This visa allowed him to work remotely for a tech company while residing in Spain.

Healthcare in Spain was another significant improvement.

For just $50 a month per person, the Michiels family received comprehensive health and dental care.

“It’s reassuring to know that excellent healthcare is accessible without breaking the bank,” Howard noted, highlighting the stark differences in healthcare costs and accessibility compared to the U.S.

The local customs further enriched their experience. Siestas were an integral part of the day, with businesses closing in the early afternoon, allowing everyone a few hours to rest and escape the midday heat.

Howard quickly adopted this practice, finding that it rejuvenated him for the second half of the day.

 

Integration and Community in Spain

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Adjusting to life in Spain was smoother than expected, largely due to the welcoming nature of the Spanish people. The community engagement was a refreshing change.

Neighbors introduced themselves, bringing along local dishes or inviting the Michiels for coffee.

“Here, people genuinely care about who you are and how you’re fitting into the community,” Howard said, appreciating the stark contrast to his experience in Denver.

Dining out revealed more about the local culture. “When we go out to eat, no one is glued to their phones. Everyone is engaged, sharing stories and enjoying the meal together,” Howard observed.

This level of interaction was something he had sorely missed in Denver and even in Atlanta.

Language was not a barrier for the family, as both Howard and his wife were fluent in Spanish. This skill greatly facilitated deeper connections and a smoother integration into the community.

“Being able to speak Spanish has allowed us to bond with locals on a more personal level and truly feel part of the community here,” Howard reflected.

The openness of the local culture extended beyond simple greetings.

It was common for neighbors to exchange small favors, enhancing the sense of community.

“It’s not uncommon for someone to knock on your door asking for a bit of sugar or some eggs, and we do the same.

It’s a small gesture, but it makes you feel connected to the people around you,” he added.

 

Reflections

Howard 3 pic

After settling into their new life in Málaga, Howard often found himself reflecting on the journey that led them here.

The stark differences between Denver and Málaga in terms of climate, community engagement, and lifestyle pace had deeply impacted their quality of life.

“In Denver, the focus was always on what’s next, always moving fast, always cold—both the weather and sometimes the people. Here, it feels like life has a rhythm that’s more natural, more humane,” Howard mused.

This contemplation brought a realization about what truly constitutes a fulfilling life.

For Howard and his family, it wasn’t the breathtaking landscapes of Colorado or the potential for outdoor adventures that they initially thought would define their happiness.

Instead, it was the warmth of personal interactions, the ease of daily living, and the balance between work and leisure that truly made a place feel like home.

Howard’s story is not just a personal narrative; it reflects a broader trend of individuals and families re-evaluating their lifestyles and priorities in the modern world.

The global accessibility afforded by remote work options, such as the Digital Nomad Visa, has opened new possibilities for many like Howard, who seek a life that aligns more closely with their values and aspirations.

In Málaga, Howard found a community that values connection, relaxation, and enjoyment of life’s simpler pleasures—values that he now realized were more aligned with his own.

“Back in the US, I felt like we were always rushing, always stressed. Here, I’ve learned to appreciate the siesta, the slow meals with family, the conversations with neighbors. It’s a different kind of wealth,” he shared.

 

Broader Implications

Howard’s successful relocation also sheds light on the growing phenomenon of cultural and lifestyle migration in the age of globalization.

As more people seek environments that foster not only economic prosperity but also personal well-being, destinations like Málaga are becoming beacons for those disillusioned with the high-paced, high-stress lifestyles prevalent in many American cities.

Furthermore, Howard’s experience underscores the impact of local cultures on expatriates’ quality of life.

The contrast between his experiences in Denver and Málaga highlights the significant role that cultural norms and community structures play in shaping one’s sense of belonging and happiness.

This narrative also prompts a discussion about the sustainability of urban lifestyles in the United States, where rising costs of living and the prioritization of work over personal life often lead to burnout and dissatisfaction.

Howard’s story is a testament to the potential benefits of embracing alternative living arrangements and the importance of cultural fit in choosing a place to call home.

 

Conclusion

As the sun sets over the Mediterranean, casting a warm glow over the streets of Málaga, Howard and his family feel a sense of peace that was once elusive.

The move to Spain has not only provided them with a more affordable lifestyle but has also enriched their lives in ways they hadn’t imagined.

The decision to leave Denver, though fraught with challenges, ultimately led them to a place that truly feels like home.

Howard’s journey from the cold, fast-paced life of Denver to the warm, relaxed rhythm of Málaga offers a powerful narrative about finding one’s place in the world.

It’s a reminder that sometimes, the key to happiness isn’t about seeking new landscapes, but in seeing the existing ones with new eyes, and perhaps, finding a new sky under which to lay roots.

This story of transition, discovery, and adaptation is a resonant message for anyone contemplating a significant life change.

It highlights the importance of aligning one’s environment with personal values and the profound impact of community and culture on overall well-being.

As Howard and his family continue to weave their story into the tapestry of Málaga, they do so with hearts full of gratitude and eyes open to the endless possibilities that life can offer when one is willing to chase the sun.

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